[ic newspaper] The Paper
[ic newspaper] The Paper
A gnome and a goblin put their heads together in a quiet corner of the inn. Ratchet, a dangerous place for little people. "Buy us another drink?" - "Nah, broke..." - "Shit, me too. Do you at least have a pen and paper? We can't write a paper without stationery!" - "I've got a pen. And an old napkin. That'll do for now!" - "Once we're rich..." - "Rich! But of course what we do is also art..." - "And journalism!" - "But what's it going to be called, the paper?" - "Um... well... The Paper, obviously!"...
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
Once again, a goblin and a gnome are seen putting their heads together at the inn in Ratchett. "You gotta do this." - "I told you I can't!" - "Come on, we can't go on writing this by hand! Look at the letters!" - "I know..." - "I was hoping for ads, which mean gold, not complaints!" - "I know! But I''m no inventor, my father was! I can barely repair stuff!" - "What about the rest of your family?" - "There's no... well. There is my great-granduncle..." - "Perfect!" - "But he's... oh fine, I'll ask him." Heads are bowing again towards paper strewn on the table, frantical scribbling can be seen. Then, suddenly: "Do you think we're going to need security?"
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
A by now somewhat familiar sight: The gnome Pip and the goblin Flinks are talking in Ratchett: "We need to publish The Paper weekly. People need continuity!" - "What? How are we going to write that much? What if we are late? We just publish whenever we are done! Surprises are good, right?" - "Right... Especially since your articles are way too short!" - "No way, people don't read that much! They just want to seem educated by holding a paper, trust me on this!"
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
Pip and Flinks, discussing business again: "We can't go on like this." - "What? It's readable now, isn't it?" - "I meant ads. Money! We can't go on without publishing ads!" - "But we don't have any yet!" - "Or we could look for an investor..." - "What kind of investor?" - "The kind that gives us money." - "In exchange for what?" - "Nothing." - "So, a dumb investor? Ingenious!"
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
Not in the inn this time, but in close vicinity, Pip is seen sitting on a crate, face rather sad, with Flinks standing in front of her. "What’s wrong?” - "Some pigeon oversalted my lunch." - "..." - "On the bright side: someone sent us alcohol. I’m just not sure I’m ready for that yet, it’s got crocilisc tears in it..." - "Let me see... Well, we’ll keep that for a special occasion." - "Oh, and we’ve got our first ad. And the alcohol-guy maybe wants to sponsor us!" - "That sounds terrific! Why the long face?" - "I’m hungry..." - "...and...?!" - "I’ve had it with birds!" - "Why, what’s wrong with them?" - "A macaw brought THAT!" - "Well... let’s take the gold. Print... whatever. And then let’s go buy us something to eat!"
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
Looking for something? Or someone? Or do you want to sell something? I know just the place! The (soon to be!) very prestigious newspaper The Paper - independent, incorruptible, ingenious! - is selling advert space for a very fair price! If you have anything to publish in this up and coming very prestigious newspaper, please send a letter to Pipzarati and we shall make you an offer you can't refuse!
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
Pip and Flinks have been busy acquiring funds for future issues by selling advert space to possibly questionable people and collecting new stories...
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
A forest troll and a goblin discussing philosophical questions. "I never understood newspapers. Why would anybody buy them? It's like an orc boring everybody with their stories in an inn." - "Well, they buy the paper before reading it, so it doesn't matter, if they get bored." - "But why would anybody ever talk to you?" - "Well, some people just like to read their name in the paper. Or they have an agenda. Or they are just really drunk." - "So people are dumb." - "Goes without saying, but curiosity is a strong urge. Suspense, fear and controversy always sell." - "Well, I am not going to buy your paper..."
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“You promised what?” – “A story.” – “A rectification!” – “It’s not a rectification!” – “It is when you print we got it all wrong! When did we agree on doing that? We don’t do that!” – “I promised them on the account of them being quite polite about this!” – “We’re in The-Paper-business! We can’t do polite! We need to earn money!” – “You haven’t seen how freakishly tall one of them was! He needn’t have been polite!” – “Surely he wasn’t that large. You’re just ridiculously small!” – “Which makes him even taller to me!!!” – “... sounds reasonable.” – “And it’s NOT an actual rectification!”
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
“Look at that.” – “... yeah. So what?” – “So what?” – “So what.” – “We shouldn’t have done that piece like this. We hurt her feelings!” – “What? One whiny letter and you already back down? We are professionals!” – “This goes directly against our integrity!” – “Integrity? Come on now, our integrity demands that we report on opinions of great variety. What can you buy with conformity? Nothing! Controversy is what people like to read. It’s called demand. We supply.” – “As if it were that easy!” – “It is. Now hand over the letters, that’s good stuff, we gotta print that...”
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
[In celebration of our upcoming 10th (in words: TENTH!) issue - we made it into a card game^^ Thanks to Zaborovski and Drust from Ered Ruin!]
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
"Oh no! I made a typo again!" - "Whatever. Calm down. You did fine. It's okay." - "Noooo! We need to issue a correction." - "You need to stop this correction thing, seriously..." - "But..." - "Oh come on now. Are you going to cry? Please don't. You know what? Fine. But I will draw up the correction. This is a delicate matter. Let me handle it." - "You will? Really?" - "I'd do anything for you, partner. You know that."
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
time and date (last footnote for today)*******
*******
When: 8. Juli 2023, 7AM Kalimdor Server Time
Where: Rats Guild Base (Thousand Needles)
Who: Any partying RPer
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
My dear Pip,
I was relieved to receive your letter. Great to hear your research in Stormwind going well and you even found a place to lay low, if need be. You are a professional now, but humans are still dangerous, so be careful!
Also, it is very nice that you signed me up for a secret society or inn or something in Stormwind. Or whatever you meant, honestly didn't quite get that one.
Sales for The Paper are going well, but that printing machine of yours is not always working. Well, it is doing something, just not what I want it to do.
Don't get yourself killed and don't promise anybody anything stupid,
Flinks
PS: No corrections!
Re: [ic newspaper] The Paper
At the docks in Ratchet, a gnome and a goblin could be seen sitting at the waterfront, atop the poles, legs dangling precariously over the edge. In fact, one could only assume one was a gnome, because basically all there could be seen was a big fluff of pink hair, and a much bigger fluff of equally pink cotton candy in front of the body, while the goblin was drinking from a suspiciously inconspicuous looking bottle.
“Where’d you get that?” – “Made it myself. Finally brought my dad’s fluff-making-machine-thingie over here. Where’d you get yours?” – “Where do you think?” – “I thought that’s not a thing in Ratchet?” – “For the likes of you, maybe. I’m a goblin in a goblin town. Anyways, I don’t even know what you mean.” – A bit later: “We really should get to work again sometime.” – “Mhm... heard anything newsworthy?” – “... not so much.” – “What a silly season...”
“Where’d you get that?” – “Made it myself. Finally brought my dad’s fluff-making-machine-thingie over here. Where’d you get yours?” – “Where do you think?” – “I thought that’s not a thing in Ratchet?” – “For the likes of you, maybe. I’m a goblin in a goblin town. Anyways, I don’t even know what you mean.” – A bit later: “We really should get to work again sometime.” – “Mhm... heard anything newsworthy?” – “... not so much.” – “What a silly season...”
